Today during a consulting group meeting at A Quiet Place we were invited to consider the benefits of darkness. Darkness that is not just physical but spiritual as well. As a part of the exercise we were invited to bring a part of us that we have kept in the dark into God's presence. Immediately I went to that need I have to be in control of myself. One thought led to another and before I knew it I was asking God where He was at in my childhood.
Now obviously I'm leaving out a few steps in how I got there and I'm not sure that I'm wanting to be that open and vulnerable right now in this place. But it leaves me with a lot of processing to do around the reasons why I fear/resist some things and embrace others.
The more I learn about how childhood and family history impact the ways I respond today the more amazed I am at how complex we are as people. What an amazing thing God does in our lives to bring us to a point that we can function semi-coherently and with more grace then we might give if we were only a product of our circumstances.
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