The Hard Work Pays Off

Over the last week I have had several opportunities to talk to couples who have been married for over 25 years. In all the conversations the hard work of marriage was mentioned. Each couple talked about how hard some parts of their married lives have been. One couple verbalized that the only way they got through it was that for both of them divorce wasn't an option.
It seems like many people think that marriage should be the easiest relationship, after all when you are in love that is enough. The problem is that love fades, it is effected by bad breath and words spoken in moments of anger. The feeling of love won't carry a marriage. Only the commitment to love will carry a marriage through the years. When I ask a couple of they are committed through sickness and health, in wealth and in poverty, etc. I'm really asking are you willing to stick this out no matter what?
The amazing thing that I see in these couples and I have read in the statistics is that when a couple stays together through the rough times and works at the relationship they are happier than they thought they would ever become. Now it does mean that you have to do hard work, but almost everyone who does it says that the work was more than worthwhile. This is one of the reasons that I'm excited about the Marriage Mentoring program that we are going to be offering after the first of the year.
Stay tuned for more info to come.

Safe Harbor or Pit Stop

After a long morning of conversation with church leadership about the mission and direction of the church an image came to mind that might make a difference in how we approach the conversation. It seems that underlying our conversation there is a fundamental difference in the way we approach the role of the church. The question I was wrestling with is this, is the church a safe harbor to provide respite and safety from the stormy world or is the church a pit stop to renew, refuel, make adjustments and then get people back out into the world to make a difference for God?
The way I read the New Testament it seems like Jesus' intention was to leave behind him pockets of revolutionaries that are supposed to live out the Kingdom of God in the here and now. This would mean that the Church was supposed to be the avenue that supported and encouraged revolutionary living. These revolutionaries are supposed to be changing the world by the way they live and the way they love one another and those around them.
Depending upon what image one uses to understand the Church it will have a major impact in the way the church is structured

An Empty Seat

One of the things that I find myself missing about being in class and working on my degree are the conversations between classes. Those long evening meals talking with Jonathan, Jeff, Jack, Brian, and so many others about life. Not having an agenda about what needs to be talked about, but just letting a conversation flow in its natural progression. Allowing the laughter to come and even being willing to approach the tears of gut level honesty.

I need to make sure that those times are not just a distant memory but are actually happening with others along the road of life.

A little time away

We are spending a couple days away just trying to breathe and regroup a bit. Sometimes just a change of scenery makes a big difference. When you get to breathe into this ....

it does have a tendency to renew the soul.

More from Day of Caring

Here is the crew that took off last week and worked in our community. They washed windows and played Bingo with residents of nursing homes. They sorted food at the food bank and sanded drywall. They did whatever was asked of them and did it with a smile.

They truly are living out the Gospel of Jesus!

A quick pic

Just one of our volunteers from this past Saturday's Day of Caring.

Thanks Austin.

He really is a good kid, even though his choice of teams to root for is maybe a little questionable :).

Holding Your Tongue

The phrase is one that we hear and know but few of us actually practice. As I'm preparing for a new class tonight I've been thinking about what it means to not speak. When I go away to the monastery on retreat I go to a place that practices silence. It is a time a refreshment and stillness that restores my soul.
Now the problem is that I don't keep watch over my tongue in the same way when I'm around other people. If I'm going to get into trouble with folks it is usually because I speak without thinking and what I say is taken in the wrong way or I speak to bluntly for the situation. I'm learning in small ways and over a lot of time that every thought that comes into my head does not need to be expressed.
This is where the practice of silence or holding ones tongue comes into play. It is the practice of listening rather than speaking. It is about allowing the time to speak words that are thought out rather than blurted out. It is the willingness to consider the feelings of others and not wanting to offend.
Now a couple of things that silence is not. It is not withholding words of correction. It isn't an excuse to allow a brother or sister to do things that might hurt them or others because you don't want to offend or anger them. It isn't about withholding information from others when it might help them.
Silence is something that most of us aren't really comfortable with, but it is a discipline that will allow us to experience the God's grace and presence in ways that we have never been able to in the past.

In the story of Elijah in 1 Kings 19 we see the power of God coming to the prophet in the stillness and we too can hear the voice of God if we learn to be quiet and listen.

Discernment

Beginning tomorrow night (Wed.) I'll be teaching a class at church that I have titled "The Other Disciplines." I'll be focusing upon those classical disciplines that are often overlooked in today's culture. I'm going to start out with two that seem in short supply these days. The first will be discernment and the second will be holding our tongues.
Discernment in a group setting is a difficult and time consuming work, but one that is well worth the time because non of us are smarter than all of us. Now that doesn't mean that I'll be championing consensus, even though that is a good goal. I'll be helping people learn how to seek out others to help process the decisions of faith and life that so often we go alone. The second discipline is one that is actually necessary before we can practice the first. In a discernment setting if the people present don't know how to hold their tongues and speak when they have wisdom and not just opinions discernment will never happen.
One of the hardest things to learn is to know when to speak and when to keep silence. In order to encorporate this discipline into our lives the first thing we must learn is that there are other ways to do things than "my way." That there are multiple ways to do the right thing means that we can be open to God being at work in a way that we have not considered and would not necessarily embrace at first.
I think this should be a good class and pray that the people who will come to be apart of it will embrace some new perspectives and habits that will draw them closer to God.

A Day of Caring

About 105 of us gathered today to go out into our community and do what we could to make a small difference. We did things such as trim bushes, wash windows, sort food, help in a couple of nursing homes, and work on some projects at a couple of non-profit centers. Once again the people of faith rise up to act like the people of faith that they are.

WELL DONE!

Being Transformed

We have been asking people to consider what living a life transformed by Jesus looks like. As we have focused upon the difference between what the Bible says should be the marks of discipleship and the reality of our own lives I have been struck by a number of things.
1) Most of us say we want to follow Jesus but very few of us actually do much more than the basics of reading the Bible, praying, and/or showing up for worship to make that happen.
2) A lot of what the Bible says about being a follower of Christ has little connection with what our culture thinks Christians are supposed to be like.
3) It all starts with loving God and loving our neighbors.
4) When you look at #3 it sounds so easy, but turns out being so hard.

Remembering Bob

Today we get to celebrate Bob's life. Bob died this past weekend after a relatively quick decline due to cancer. The good news is that it really is a celebration. When I saw Bob shortly after the Doctors told him that there wasn't anything that they could do for him he was not depressed. In fact he wrote on some paper something along the lines of, "How exciting it will be to see what God is going to do now, God is Good!"
In these last two weeks the family came together and shared story after story of their lives together. There wasn't a time when I saw the family either in the hospital or at the hospice home that there wasn't laughter present. The joy that they shared together was heartening for all of us who saw them together.
This will not be a funeral of sadness, even though there may be a few tears shed, it will be a joyous celebration of life! Thanks Bob! For a life lived filled with faith, joy, and forgiveness. You will not be soon forgotten.

Remembering the Saints

Last night as we were planning music for upcoming worship services we took time to watch a video put together by Greg Furgeson of Willow Creek called "Fast.Forword". It is a look at the history of the church in word and image that we are going to use in some of the services on the first Sunday of Nov. The plan is to use it in conjunction with the celebration of the lives of those who have died this past year. We celebrate All Saints Day the first weekend of November and it is a wonderful time to remember those who have gone before us.
The video is a powerful and moving experience for me. It fills me with hope and joy that I get to be a part of this great body of Christ that we call the church. I know that there are many things that people see wrong in the church and wish were different. In my more pessimistic days I can add quite a few things to the list, but at the same time I cannot think of anything that I would rather do than build for the future of this great body of Christ.
The thing that I believe I am supposed to be doing with my life is very simple and that is to be preparing the church for my grand children's children. My purpose and focus in life is geared toward helping the church prepare for the future and the changes that it will have to face in the coming decades. I look forward with great expectation to a vibrant church where my grand children's children will embrace Jesus within the church that they to might join the long lines of saints who are faithful in both the great as well as the small ways of life.
I hope that you too will enjoy the "Fast.Forward" experience.

The Role of a Mission Statement

Because of a recent conversation it seems to me that a little reflection upon the role of a Mission Statement in an organization might be significant.
During the last part of the 20th Century people in all areas of life; business, non-profit, education, religious organizations, even individuals jumped on the importance of clarifying goals and process. In this time, terms such as Mission Statement, Vision Statement, Core Values, Guiding Themes, BHAGs, Strategic Planning, etc. all took on a sense of urgency. But it wasn't' long before the confusion began.
Is that a vision statement or a mission statement? How can you measure that? It isn't specific enough! It is to specific! The litany goes on and a whole industry of business coaches and seminar leaders have grown up to walk people through the confusion.
The reality is that many companies, churches, and other organizations went through the process of developing and refining all these slogans and then did nothing else with them. The result for many people were hours spent talking with little to show for it. There are of course exceptions and those were organizations that not only did the hard work of development but then grabbed hold of it like a bulldog and would not let go. These success stories are ones that are lifted up as examples of what is possible if only everyone had a Mission Statement, if only everyone had a Vision Statement, if only everyone had a strategic plan, etc.
In the midst of this debate let's stop and look at what might be considered a personal mission statement:
(My mission is) to preach good news to the poor, proclaim freedom for the prisoners, recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, and to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."
It might sound familer because it is what Jesus says in Luke 4:18-19 as he is reading from the scroll of Isaiah. If you look at everything that Jesus did in light of this statement it is clear that he never waivered in his focus of living this out. Because of Jesus focus' the course of history and religious belief was forever changed.
One could say that the current mission statement of the church as I have discussed in the previous several posts is really the mission of the universal church. Living out the way of the New Testament, reaching those far from God, and building people up into the likeness of Christ should be the goal of every faith community following the teachings of Jesus and his disciples. It could be my point of view, but I don't know how you could read the Bible and not include these points as the key role of being the church.
For me I think the confusion arises around how specific a local church needs to be in their mission statement. Does God call an individual part of the universal church to a specific way of accomplishing the greater goal of the Kingdom? If so in what ways will the local church specialize or focus their mission in a way that will allow them to fulfill the larger mission of the church? I think that is really the question, Does God call each church body to be everything for everyone, or is the local church body called to reach a slice of the population and encourage and cheer on others who are reaching other slices. Until we get that answer firmly in mind a mission statement will either be ignored or will lead to competing demands and expectations.
May the conversation and prayers go on for the glory of God and for our neighbors good!

Mission Statement

I want to move now to the questions surrounding discipleship.
The Mission Statement says the church is to "Develop fully mature disciples of Jesus Christ." The questions surround what that looks like and how does one get there. I think there are a couple of different ways one can address the characteristics of a mature disciple. One would be a self-reflective question, "Does my life reflect a deeper love for Jesus today than yesterday?" For most of us that question is hard to answer on a daily basis. I know that I can look back and say that my life is different today from what what it was two years ago and for sure twenty years ago, because of a growing love of Jesus. However to say that today is different than Monday is more difficult.
Another way to address maturity in discipleship would be to gage our lives against the fruit of the spirit that Paul addresses in Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. These are characteristics that others should be able to see in our behavior as well as in our attitudes. If we aren't exhibiting these characteristics than we aren't maturing.
The problem that I have with leaving it at this point is knowing what our interior motivation is in acting like a mature disciple. Because the truth is that discipleship is really who one is when no one else is looking. To get at this disciples of Jesus need to be in significant spiritual relationships with other believers. From the very earliest days of the church, through the monastic movement, to John Wesley, to the contemporary small group movement the focus has been on covenant relationships that hold us accountable to live a life worthy of the name, "follower of Jesus."
These relationships can fall under a variety of classifications: Spiritual Director, accountability partner, covenant group, mentoring relationship, etc. There are some things that all of these have in common if they are going to work in growing us up toward discipleship. 1) The relationship is long term, it isn't a six week Bible study done with 20 other people. 2) There is a freedom to ask the hard questions and an expectation to give honest answers. 3) The relationship is one that regularly focuses upon the spiritual practices of faith and an encouragement to participate at deeper and deeper levels. 4) There is in the relationship times when confession is shared verbally and the words of forgiveness are spoken out load by another person. All of these things have over the centuries shown the likely hood of forming people into the likeness of Christ.
If we are expecting people to grow in discipleship than we should expect that they will be in significant long term spiritual relationships. Those relationships are going to look very different for different people because of their stage in life, family commitments, and travel commitments. However those are not impossible to overcome and with today's technology there is no reason why everyone who wants to could not carve out at least an hour every other week to engage in significant spiritual conversation, prayer, and accountability.
Just some ideas about discipleship, what I have found personally helpful and have seen historically to be the best practices of those who desire to follow Jesus.